Having a “good” fight

 

3 tips to having a “GOOD” fight…

by RICHARD LUCK

 

The simple truth is that we are all going to end up having fights and  arguments throughout our lives.

To think otherwise would be self-delusional!

For me, it makes more sense  to be prepared for it rather than to pretend it’s never going to happen.

I don’t mean that you should always anticipating a fight and be thinking about your tactics. That would be attracting it into your life, and that’s not a good thing.

What I do mean is, having a strategy so that you can reduce or eliminate the negative emotions that often result from the fight.

Here’s three tips that will help you do that:

1. Respect the other persons opinion.

Keep in mind that the other person’s opinion is very very important to them. It’s not something that they are going to give up just because you disagree with it.

By  doing this it will help you to remain less emotional and more rational. And that’s a big key to eliminating the negative emotions that come from fighting.

2. The other person is always right!

If you can take that position from the onset of any disagreement, then you’ll be able to understand why they have a different opinion to you.

Put yourself in their shoes for just a few minutes and really try and learn why they think that way.

You don’t have to agree with them, but trying to understand why they think that way will keep the emotions a lot lower.

A word of caution here – Don’t just listen to them and then tell them why they are wrong, truly try to understand why they might be right.

It will create an enormous amount of respect from them, for you. And that’s going to help a lot when you put your thoughts forward.

3. Don’t accept abusive or disrespectful language.

This goes both ways, you shouldn’t use it and you shouldn’t accept it from them.

If you feel you are getting too emotional, then let the other person know and ask them if it’s ok to finish the conversation a little later.

That gives you time to calm down and think rationally about the argument.

If they get abusive or disrespectful, explain to them that the agreement is too emotional and you’d like to continue it when they have calmed down.

VERY IMPORTANT NOTE: These tips are for dealing with most normal arguments. If you are in a physically abusive situation, then seek professional help  right now, before any more arguments take place.

There is really no excuse for verbal abuse, and certainly there isn’t any excuse for physical abuse.

 

 

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