Emotional Intelligence = to be connected to our emotions,
in tune with them, and able to appreciate them
without being ruled by them.
Emotional intelligence skills help to achieve ongoing meaningful relationships. These skills need to be learnt.
The source of our communication and relationship problems largely come from emotional memory of our very first relationships, and the perception we have of ourselves and others.
Emotional memory can override our thoughts and profoundly influence our behaviour.
Developing emotional intelligence results in being in charge of your emotions and thus your behaviour, instead of your emotional memory dictating your behaviour. This emotional memory (baggage) is the source of many relationship problems.
The path to emotional intelligence is in the healing of emotional memory.
The healing is in the expression of the feeling.
Learn to feel your feelings, accept and express…….giving rise to appropriate choice of behavior.
Developing Emotional Intelligence is an amazing self empowering skill.
Would you agree that most arguments start with an issue but always end with (anger/resentment) how the other doesn’t know how to communicate? What you’re each saying is that the other doesn’t know how to communicate the way that you do…and you’re right! But that doesn’t make them wrong. The wrong in these case is the lack of understanding what communication truly is. Communication is saying what you want to a person the way they need to hear it. It’s that simple. This requires truly listening and getting an understanding of how the other person expresses themselves and stop calling them wrong for doing so.
So, I’ll close this by saying how we express our emotions are the beginning and end of all relationship woes. If we’d first understand ourselves and how we express and receive information, we could then begin the process of understanding someone else. At the end of the day, any issue that you have in your life , as it relates to communication, is only solved by changing yourself first!!!! T Scott (dehypnotize.wordpress.com)
More techniques to follow in future posts
- Bar On EQ -i-2.0 Emotional Intelligence Assessment now available On-line (angerblog.wordpress.com)
- Measuring Your Emotional Intelligence (eitheory.com)